See Ya!

 

  While The VCH is on vacation, please enjoy the lovely, the talented, the British, Lily Allen.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Oh, I'm ready for it!

 

   Pardon Mr. Jackson's language, but I can't remember being this excited to see a movie in a long time.  I realize I have fallen into the marketing trap that is internet buzz, but I can't help it.  Snakes on a Plane is going to be the best movie of the summer!

  Last week while I was waiting for my wife and child to emerge from a store at the mall, I got roped into taking a survey about movie trailers.  They asked me a few questions and then determined that I was most qualified to answer questions about the Snakes on a Plane trailer.  The guy ended up asking me all kinds of crazy questions- the funniest thing being if I thought the snake attack was limited to the plane or if there was something else going on.  "Like what?" I asked.  "It seems pretty self-contained."  "Oh, I don't know, like the plane lands at the end and the world is overrun by snakes, like Planet of the Apes."  I sure hope that silly dude didn't blow the surprise ending for me!  LOL

  Okay, Snakes on a Plane- your marketing campaign has roped me in.  Now deliver the goods.  (Come on, bring it! )

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  Ironically, one of the other movies I could have watched a trailer for, but didn't was Clerks II.  It's ironic because I said I "might" see that one (Snakes was a "probably") and I ended up going to see it yesterday.  It was uproariously funny, but definitely for a niche audience that likes raunchiness.  Not for the easily offended, for sure.  I don't think a minute went by without a bad word being uttered.  If you do not enjoy humor in which characters talk about, watch, or imply that someone performs the most disgustingly deviant sex acts, then avoid this film.    Clerks II grade: A

Ok, THIS is probably my last post before vacation!  Bye!

Last stop before the beach

  Next week at this time, we will be on vacation and I will more than likely be sitting on the beach.  I know I haven't been writing in here much, so I hesitate to call my two week absence a hiatus.  Also, this year I will have my laptop down there so if we can steal a signal from an unprotected wireless network or I drag myself down to the internet cafe, you might see me on here and you might just get an entry alert.  I hate to wish away the summer, but I just want this week to be over so we can get going with the vacation.

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   I finally watched the two movies from Netflix we had sitting around since June.

  First was 16 Blocks, starring Bruce Willis.  I'm pretty sure it is impossible for Bruce to make an unwatchable movie.  This one was well done and pretty exciting.  Mos Def's voice is really irritating at first, which it is supposed to be, but the characters really develop along the way and by the end, you forget the voice and see the person.  It's a typical buddy/action picture, but it works and I really enjoyed it.   Grade: A

  Next was Hostel.  I had mixed feelings going into this one.  On one hand, I heard that people left the theater throwing up which points to "promising" in my book.  But on the other hand, I was so badly disappointed by Cabin Fever, Eli Roth's first directorial effort, that I was expecting to be let down again. 

  This film drew comparisons to Wolf Creek and I could see why.  Both are about kids who are out for a good time and end up captured and tortured.  And most similarly, for the first 30 minutes, absolutely nothing happens.  The difference is that the first 30 boring minutes of Hostel are eventually called back on once things get going.  The first half of Wolf Creek served no purpose whatsoever.  Though I wasn't scared and I didn't throw up, Hostel was still a pretty good movie.  I can honestly say that I did not see the big twist coming, which ended up making me enjoy it all the more.  Maybe it was predicatable to some, but I hadn't read anything about this movie, so when it happened, I had one of those jaw-dropping moments that I hadn't felt since the last episode of LOST.

  The gore wasn't too bad either.  Maybe I'm just desensitized to it, but I didn't see why anyone would leave the theater screaming or puking.  It wasn't worse than any other gorefests that are out there.  In fact, a surprising amount of stuff happens off camera, including the deaths of two main characters.

Okay, I'm just rambling off the top of my head now.  I enjoyed Hostel.  Sue me!  Grade: B+

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This Week's Top Ten:

1. LDN- Lily Allen

2. Fidelity- Regina Spektor

3. Dancing on the Lip of a Volcano- New York Dolls

4. Happy- Snowglobe

5. Smile- Lily Allen

6. Connecticut's For F*cking- Jesus H. Christ and the Four Hornsmen of the Apocalypse

7. Catastrophe- Rainer Maria

8. Lloyd, I'm Ready to be Heartbroken- Camera Obscura

9. The Other Side of Mt. Heart Attack- Liars

10. Alive With the Glory of Love- Say Anything

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  Janelle Watch '06-  Janelle, the best Big Brother player ever, continued to be on the winning side of things in Week 2.  Though she didn't win anything herself, her alliance held onto the power, ensuring that she is not going anywhere for a while. 

In other news, she has rather predictably become good friends with Marcellas.

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Enjoy your summer!

-The VCH

1 chocolate chip cookie has 80 calories

  My new favorite thing to do at the grocery store is read the labels and drop my jaw at how bad for you junk food really is.  Chocolate labels I find particularly frightening.  If you can't live without your Hershey's and all that, do yourself a favor and remain blisfully ignorant of the label. 

  Even lunch can nail you.  The other day we looked at the back of a box of frozen White Castle hamburgers.  Eating two of those, you intake 310 calories.  When I think that I used to eat six of them for lunch, it is almost enough to make me sick. 

  I think this thirty-year-old, more mature and responsible lifestyle suits me better.  My stomach has literally shrunk, as the other night at dinner, I couldn't even finish a rack of ribs.  I can't wait to hit the beach and see what my extended family says.  They last saw me at 240 and now I'm 220.

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  Saturday night, we went to see the sneak preview of Monster House.  I was blown away.  I have not been this impressed with an animated film since Toy Story 2.  Monster House is the best cartoon I have seen as an adult.  First, the story is a little more mature than most kiddie movies.  There are some genuinely scary parts-we asked Kasey several times if she wanted to leave.  She was trembling and clinging to my arm for most of the movie and hasn't slept in her own bed since.   Second, the actual animation is fantastic.  Before the first character appears on screen, the outdoor shots look real.  And were several times I was impressed with camera angles and movements I had never seen before in a cartoon.

Monster House gets a rare A+.  Go see it this Friday.

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  Here's what I've been listening to this week:

1. LDN- Lily Allen

2. The Other Side of Mt. Heart Attack- Liars

3. Dancing on the Lip of a Volcano- New York Dolls

4. Connecticut's for F*cking- Jesus H. Christ and the Four Hornsmen of the Apocalypse

5. How We Operate- Gomez

6. Smile- Lily Allen

7. Out Here All Night- Damone

8. Happy- Snowglobe

9. Lloyd, I'm Ready To Be Heartbroken- Camera Obscura

10. Snakes in the Grass- Essex Green

Kiss My BMI

 Here's my problem with the BMI (body mass index).  You punch in a height and a weight and that's it.  It doesn't factor anything else in.  Like muscle mass or body type.  In order to be "normal" I'd have to lose at least another fifty pounds.  As it is, I am currently "obese". 

The bright side is that I am in good company:

  Former WWE champion, John Cena is listed on the WWE website as 6'1" and 240 pounds.  That's a BMI of 31 = Obese.  Look at that slob.  Doesn't it make you want to scream, "Lay off the donuts, fatty!  Life doesn't really run on Dunkin'!"

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The Office "webisodes" have finally started on NBC.com.  They're actually too short to really build on anything tremendously funny, but it's free and it's more than any other show is giving us at the moment.  Go to NBC.com/theoffice to see them.

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  Janelle Watch '06:  After one week, she has won two challenges and is still in the house.   Best BB contestant ever!

Name this entry and win!

Okay, there has never been a show I have wanted to be on more than the World Series of Pop Culture.  Out of approximately 60 questions on last night's episode, I got less than ten wrong.  I am definitely going to keep my eye out for when the auditions are for the next one.  I will win. 

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I finally got through to my case handler who cleared things up for me.  The first thing I should do is pursue a second opinion on my own.  The other thing is that my comp claim is a seperate entity from my employment with Wal-mart.  If I choose to leave my job, while she wouldn't be able to pay me, I would still be involved with the company handling my claim.

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Today I bought Jeff Herman's Guide to Book Publishers, Editors and Literary Agents.  I looked through the listing of agents and what their submission requirements are.  I have narrowed it down to 17.  Now the more thorough research begins.  I happen to think my book is pretty good and if all 17 of these agencies reject me, I will be quite disappointed.

Things To Watch

Lots of stuff on the TV tonight:

8:00- Big Brother All-Stars.  I think it was way too early to start playing hardball with the people you want out- especially when the one you want out currently holds the power.  I think Danielle is toast unless she can win the veto tonight.

9:00- Last Comic Standing.  I think Josh Blue is a shoo-in to win on sympathy votes alone.  For a bonus, he really is genuinely funny.  I'm really interested to see who gets kicked off tonight for "breaking the rules."  What could that possibly mean?

10:00- The World Series of Pop Culture.  My brother told me about this show on VH1 and I just got done watching the first episode on the internet.  I only got three questions wrong.  I can see myself becoming really frustrated by this show, just for the simple fact that I think I should be on it.  Me, my brother and my cousin- we could have nailed this thing.  Of course, I would be the ace.  When are the auditions for the second one?  :-)

 

We finally finished the second season of 24 that we got from Netflix.  I enjoyed the first season much more.  They should have tried to stretch the bomb threat for the entire day, because everything after that seemed anticlimactic and unrealistic.  Why was it so imperative to go to war immediately that the president would have to be removed for not doing it?  That was just stupid.  George Mason became the best character on the show after he got his death sentence and his death half way through  was also part of the letdown.  I still have high hopes for the third season, since I've heard the show only gets better.  By the fall we should be all caught up.

 

I enjoyed the remake of The Hills Have Eyes.  Very gory and, while not scary, it was still intense.  The thing that seperates it from most horror movies is that the victims are not sexed-crazed, stupid teenagers, but a family.  Even if you don't like every character, it's hard not to feel more horrified than normal when moms and dads and kids start getting picked off.  B+

Failure to Launch was one of the biggest pieces of crap I've ever seen.  Granted, the romantic comedy genre is not normally something I flock to, but I can enjoy them if they are well done.  This was not.  The plot is ridiculously contrived and the parts that aren't predictableare only unpredictable because of their utter bizareness.  Just a complete mess and a real crime that one of my favorite actresses, Zooey Dechanel, allowed herself to be typecast (as the smartass) in this crapfest.  F+

Update

- I'm heavily leaning toward just quitting my job.  I can't get through to my case handler so I don't know what she is going to do about the doctor situation, but I talked it over with Kate and she believes that even if I ever did get 100% better, the CTS would just come back.  Going back to the job that caused the problem before I'm healed would just make things worse.  The pluses of quitting are: I wouldn't have to drive 45 minutes to work/ I can try to get a job that makes use of my college education/ I would get to go on the family vacation in a couple of weeks.  The negatives of quitting: I leave behind a job where I have put in more than 5 years/ I would be unemployed and physically damaged.

- I've been looking into getting an agent.  If I could land a reputable one, that could really be a writing career launching pad.  Unfortunately, the task of finding a reputable agent that will give me the time of day is rather daunting.  From what I've read so far, the world of literary agents is full of pitfalls and scams.  Let's keep our fingers crossed.

- Here's what I've been listening to this week:

1. How We Operate- Gomez

2. Lloyd, I'm Ready To Be Heartbroken- Camera Obscura

3. Connecticut's For F*cking- Jesus H. Christ and the Four Hornsmen of the Apocalypse

4. Happy- Snowglobe

5. Catastrophe- Rainer Maria

6. Be Gentle With Me- The Boy Least Likely To

7. Smile- Lily Allen

8. The Other Side of Mt. Heart Attack- Liars

9. In The Morning- Razorlight

10. Snakes in the Grass- Essex Green

Double Ugh!

That mood up above should be more like FURIOUS, but AOL doesn't give that one as an option.  As the day has gone on, I've just gotten more and more upset over how my visit with the doctor today went.  I won't go into great detail, but basically, he said I was milking my injury and should go back to work since I've already been out longer than average.  Tomorrow morning I am going to call my case worker and see what she says.  I tried to explain that my wrists still feel tight and that my arms are still numb, but all he said was that he never guaranteed I would be 100% better and I probably never will be.  He asked me when I wanted to go back to work and I answered that I wanted it to be after I've seen him for the last time.  So he says, Then this is it.  Get some bicycle gloves and go back to work.  If my case handler agrees with the doctor, then I suppose I will have no choice but to suck it up and go back to work.  GRRR, I'm so angry right now.  I'm not even trying to make this coherent, so sorry.

  I dropped the shampoo in the shower this morning because a shockwave was sent up the nerves in my arm when I grabbed it.  I assure you that I am not milking anything. 

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  In other more pleasant news, my cut back on food intake and morning jogging regimen is really getting results.  My stomach is now noticeably smaller and my sister said my face is not as fat.  I started at 237 and after 1 month of this I stand at 222.  I'm so proud of myself that I try to work it in any time I talk to someone.  Hey, I lost 15 pounds.  

Yeah, I'm sure I'm annoying. 

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Well that's it for now.  My arms are getting numb from all this typing and pain faking I have to do.

Ugh

Wow!  I've really let this thing go a while without being updated.  Part of that is because we went camping this weekend.  Good times- even if it did rain some of the time, particularly at night.

Now for the bad news.  I got a call from work today saying that when they contacted my doctor he faxed them a paper saying I should be back on July 1st.  I called the nurse and she told me to come in tomorrow so the doctor can check me out.  There is no way I can do my job yet.  I am getting better, yes, but I am definitely not ready to work with "no restrictions".  Basically my stomach has been in knots all day, worried that I may have to go back to work before I am healthy.