LOST- He's Our You

Turns out the island still needed me, so I'm back after two years. Let's get right into it.

Previously on LOST, young Ben Linus met a disheveled hostile named Richard in the jungle, who told him to be patient. Years later, adult Ben hired Sayid to kill all the Widmore boys who might hurt Sayid's buddies. Still later, Sayid was transported back to the island and captured as a hostile by Jin. Oh, and it's the 70's so it's not really "later" at all. Ugh!

If there's one thing we've learned about Sayid, it's that his flashbacks are boring and predictable. When he was a boy in Iraq, his brother (?) friend (?) who cares (?) was assigned to kill a chicken but the future PETA member couldn't do it. Young boy Sayid broke a chicken's neck and handed it over, but the other boy wouldn't go along with the ruse. Dad was impressed by Sayid's killer instinct and told him he would be a man.

In 1977, young Ben Linus has taken an active interest in Sayid, the hostile prisoner. Phil tries to talk him out of bringing in another sandwich since Sayid is not eating, but Ben insists. He tells Sayid the story of how he met Richard and says that if Sayid is patient, like Ben has been, then Ben can help him. Cue creepy LOST title screen.

During the Oceanic Six days, Sayid was a hired assassin and here he is again, breaking into a panicked man's apartment and shooting him dead. The attempted bribe did not work. Sayid meets Ben in a back alley and is informed that the list is complete. Assignment over. Instead of being happy, Sayid seems to take this news like a teenager being dumped. So Ben doesn't even want to go out for cake to celebrate? That's it?? Ben tells him to go live his life.

In 1977, a grim-looking Horace enters Sayid's cell with an implement of torture, but it's a fake out. He just cuts the restraints off Sayid's wrists. Horace introduces himself and asks what Sayid was doing in the jungle, but Sayid remains silent. Horace gives him an hour to decide to talk or the stakes will get higher.

Elsewhere, Sawyer finds Juliet sadly staring out their window and asks what's up? She thinks their time playing house together is over. She never thought the O6 would come back, thus implying that maybe she didn't even want them to. She is concerned that Sayid will give them all away. Sawyer assures her he has things under control, but he uses his extra sweet voice. Ya know, distract her with kindness. Because the look on his face when Horace shows up and says there's a problem with the prisoner reveals that Sawyer is far from in control. Horace wants to bring in Oldham but Sawyer is against using "that psychopath." Instead, he offers to talk to the prisoner himself...alone.

Sawyer barges into the security station and dismisses Phil from his post. And finally, Sawyer and Sayid get to have a little quality time to work out a plan. Sayid asks how Sawyer can live there with Ben and Sawyer replies that he has no choice. Sawyer enters the cell and headbutts his friend, starting a fight. Sawyer's plan is to make it look like Sayid struggled with him as Sawyer beat a confession out of him. Then they'll say that Sayid gave up intel on the hostiles in exchange for living there with them. Voila! Problem solved. Except for......

Oh yeah, Sayid doesn't like that plan. He doesn't want to live there with them in perfect Dharma harmony. He would rather just be let go. Sawyer can't do that because he is trusted and it would blow his cover. It's either join the party or be on your own. "Then I guess I'm on my own," Sayid says determinedly.

In the Dharma cafeteria, Kate asks Jack what the plan is, but what she doesn't understand is that Jack is no longer the man with the plan. This is the new "go with the flow" Jack and he is leaving everything up to Sawyer. Happily, too. Hurley mentions the other elephant in the room (that wasn't a fat joke, I swear)- the fact that Sawyer and Juliet are together now. Kate looks understandably sad. Is it too late to change my mind about getting on that flight? Oh, crap, it is!

Back at the cell, Ben's dad, the janitor, starts mopping up and makes fun of Sayid for getting caught. Ben comes in with more food for the prisoner and receives a verbal, then physical beat down from his angry father. Sayid is shocked and angry but can do nothing from behind bars except glare. Glare and think.

He thinks about when he was building houses in the Dominican Republic and Ben came by to see him. Ben tells him about the new danger. Locke is dead and there's a thug staking out Hurley's mental institute. Sayid, still feeling like the jilted lover, questions why he should help Ben again. "You're capable of things most other men aren't," Ben tells him. Sayid says he doesn't like killing people. Ben apologizes for calling him a killer. (It was a compliment, man!) Ben walks away defeated, but not really, as we and probably he knows.

Back in '77, Sawyer is back with a security team. When Sayid remains silent during his last chance, Sawyer has no choice but to stun him and order, "Take him to Oldham."

Oldham is a creepy looking loner who lives on the outskirts of Dharmatown in a teepee. Sayid asks Sawyer who he is and Sawyer replies in a whisper, "He's our you." Hey, that's the name of this episode! Sayid tries to struggle so security ties him to a tree where he is force-fed Oldham's special brand of truth serum. That smell is Sawyer's trousers.

Back at the pier in 2007, Sayid dismisses himself from Ben's O6 reunion and goes off to a bar. He meets a beautiful woman and aw, hell, I'll just skip this part because it's boring and obvious and I mean, really, didn't we go through this exact same thing in Sayid's last episode, "The Economist?" Oh, and is the mysterious Economist dead? Ben said the list was complete! What the hell? Anyway, whats-her-name seduces Sayid, kicks him in the face and says he is going to Guam to answer for the murder of the dude from the golfcourse.

In 1977, Sayid's drugs are taking effect and he loopily answers question #1. His name is Sayid Jarrah. Then the fun really begins as Sayid is forced to spill, via truth serum, how he really came to be on the island...twice! And he knows the purposes of three Dharma stations- including the Swan which hasn't been built yet! He's from the future and you're all going to die! Wheeeeee!!! Fortunately for Sawyer and everyone else we know and love, this all sounds like crazy nonsense. Oldham apologizes for using too strong a concoction. In one of the best moments of the season, a loopy and defeated Sayid laughs maniacally and says that the dose was exactly enough. I think he finally reached that Jack-like breaking point. You win, island! Let's just do what you will!

At the motor pool, apparently no one has questioned why Juliet was suddenly an expert baby deliverer and she's back to fixing Mystery Mobiles. She has a tense and overly-polite, faux-friendly conversation with Kate about how she and Sawyer are together now.

That night, Horace has a meeting in his home with all the Dharma team leaders about what to do with Sayid. Radzinsky wants to kill him. They have no choice. He knows too much. Sawyer, obviously, is against this but slowly and surely, the argument begins to favor Radzinsky. Even the reluctant and possibly benevolent Horace calls for execution when it's finally put to a vote. He turns to Sawyer, the lone "nay" vote and says that he would really like to call it unanimous. Giving in to peer pressure and self-preservation, Sawyer has no choice but to raise his hand and vote his friend dead.

Saywer's last ditch plan is to have it look like Sayid beat him up and escaped. But Sayid will not go, even in the face of execution. Sayid explains that when he woke up in the jungle and realized where he was, he felt he had no purpose left. But now he knows what it is. Sawyer thinks he's crazy for thinking his purpose is to get shot and leaves the cell in a huff.

Sawyer gets to his own doorstep, pauses and walks over to Kate's house. Oh, so it's starting already. Poor Juliet! He asks why she came back (and messed up everything!!!!!) Kate says she only knows why she came back. (LOST- proudly serving answers that don't answer anything since 2004!) Before the conversation can go further, they are distracted by the old flaming Dharma van crashing into a house and starting a massive fire trick. The fire brigade springs into action and saves the occupants of the house. Jack asks what happened and Sawyer says, "Three years and no burning buses! Ya'll are back for one day..." (and messed up everything!!!!!!) And that line cements in Sawyer the opinion that Juliet expressed earlier. They waited so long for something that they forgot why they were waiting... and maybe they didn't even want it anymore.

The burning bus, it turns out, was young Ben's plan to distract everyone so he could spring Sayid from jail. Sayid plays along and says that he has been sent to get Ben. They run off together into the jungle and I think it's safe to assume what Sayid thinks his new purpose is. Because he's boring and predicatable. Jin finds the two runaways and starts to call it in, but Sayid kicks his butt and takes his gun. Then he says, "You were right about me. I am a killer." Sayid pulls the trigger and shoots the surprised boy dead. Predictable in execution, gigantic in canonical implications!

Next time: Horace knows someone let Sayid out of his cell and Sawyer's long con starts crumbling down thanks to those damned O6ers!