Movie Quote Challenge

As promised, here is my long-awaited latest challenge.  I saw this in another journal and it's a type I haven't done yet, so I figured why not?  Identify the movie from the line of dialogue given.  This should be pretty difficult, so good luck!  Oh, and I tried to make most of them funny, so even if you have no clue, you might still chuckle at a few.

1. Hey, is this the kind of retard that drools and rubs shit in his hair and all that?  'Cause I'm gonna have a hard time eatin' 'round that kind of thing now. Just like I am with antique furniture and midgets. You know that- I can't so much as drink a damn glass of water around a midget or a piece of antique furniture.

2. Is it just me or does the jungle make you really, really horny?

3. You were never there for me, were you mother? You expected Mike and Carol Brady to raise me! I'm the bastard son of Claire Huxtable! I am a lost Cunningham! I learned the facts of life... from watching The Facts of Life! Oh God!

4. I wasn't like every other kid, you know, who dreams about being an astronaut. I was always more interested in what bark was made out of on a tree. Richard Gere's a real hero of mine. Sting. Sting would be another person who's a hero. The music he's created over the years- I don't really listen to it, but the fact that he's making it, I respect that. I care desperately about what I do. Do I know what product I'm selling? No. Do I know what I'm doing today? No. But I'm here, and I'm gonna give it my best shot.

5. Listen up, maggots. You are not special. You are not a beautiful or unique snowflake. You're the same decaying organic matter as everything else.

6. As Mr. Sloan always says, there is no "I" in team, but there is an "I" in pie. And there's an "I" in meat pie. Meat is the anagram of team... I don't know what he was talking about.

7. What makes a man a man? A friend of mine once wondered. It's the choices he makes. Not how he starts things, but how he finishes them.

8. Us Christian girls have got to learn to protect ourselves. I mean, sure Jesus could restore my physicaland spiritual virginity, especially if I lost it to some rapist, but who wants that? I'm saving myself for marriage, and I'll use force if necessary.

9. You better be careful. You know those flight attendents ain't like regular women, Viktor. They're flying back and forth between all those time zones kinda messes with their biological clock or something.  Always ready for sex.  Why do you think they can't stop smiling?

10. What difference does it make if it's true? If it's a story and it breaks, they're gonna run with it.

11. "The most terrifying day of your life is the day the first one is born."

"Nobody ever tells you that." 

"Your life, as you know it... is gone.  Never to return. But they learn how to walk and they learn how to talk...  And you want to be with them.  And they turn out to be the most delightful people you will ever meet in your life."

12. Mwahahahahahahahah....Ohhh, I just love The Family Circus.  It's the same joke over and over but I guess I just can't get enough of those little moppet shenanigans.

13. So I was sitting in my cubicle today and I realized, ever since I started working, every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it. So that means that every single day that you see me, that's on the worst day of my life.

14. I don't want to cram in sex or guns or car chases or characters learning profound life lessons or growing or coming to like each other or overcoming obstacles to succeed in the end. The book isn't like that and life isn't like that- it just isn't. I feel very strongly about this.

15. Okay, James, I wish you hadn't shot my girlfriend's dog. Even though Poe and I weren't exactly what you'd call simpatico, that's no reason he should've taken two in the chest.

16. Do you know what it's like to be on the bill and to play for 15 minutes and the only people there to see you are the other bands and their girlfriends? Don't talk to me about rock 'n' roll! I'm out there in the clubs and on the streets and I'm living it!

17. Well, what do you wanna hear, man? Do you wanna hear that sometimes I think about eatin' a bullet?  Huh? Well, I do! I even got a special bullet for the occasion with a hollow point- look!  Make sure it blows the back of my goddamned head out and do the job right! Every single day I wake up and I think of a reason not to do it! Every single day! You know why I don't do it? This is gonna make you laugh! You know why I don't do it?  The job!  Doin' the job!  Now that's the reason!

18. Maybe I'm spending too much of my time starting up clubs and putting on plays. I should probably be trying harder to score chicks.

19. Aristotle was not Belgian, the principle of Buddhism is not "every man for himself", and the London Underground is not a political movement. Those are all mistakes, Otto. I looked them up.

20. The only thing that matters is the ending. It's the most important part of the story. And this one is very good. This one is perfect.