The Weekend

  Yes, I wanted to write about the last few days, but right now I am trying to suppress my rage.  The PS2 is not working, and when I asked Kasey about it, she said, probably because I stepped on it.  This kid!

  Anyway, while in Albany playing the Mexican Train Game (dominoes) with my family, I coined a new phrase.  We often attribute things to 'dumb luck', but what about 'smart luck'?  Maybe I'm feeling a little cocky about winning all three games we played, but I like to think that my observation skills and making smart moves comes into play sometimes.  Now that I've invented smart luck, I'm sure I will lose every game for the rest of the summer.

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  Mallrats is widely regarded as Kevin Smith's worst film, but I and most people I know have always loved it.  Jason Lee's over the top bad acting steals the movie, but you've also got Claire Forlani's all over the place American accent, and a before he was famous Ben Affleck.  When Shannen Doherty is the best actor you've got, you know you're making a classic.  Fortunately, the script is really funny and the terrible acting somehow makes it better- the movie is about slackers, so perhaps sloppy acting is appropriate- anyway, it works. 

  Why do I bring this up?  Because as my brother flipped through channels Friday night, he came across a crime.  Mallrats was being aired on the WE network and was billed as a chick flick!  What?????  This is really a five question mark question.  If a channel for women wants to air a chick flick, I have no problem with that, but at least have the decency to know what one is.  There are plenty of other movies to pick from.  There are other Kevin Smith movies to pick from!  How about Jersey Girl?

  However, if there's one thing that can save a movie being aired on network television, it is hilariously bad editing.  I wish I had felt like watching this thing all the way through (but I had a domino game to dominate), because I can tell this would have brought a whole new level to the comedy.  In one early scene I did see, the censors really outdid themselves in the their efforts to protect our sensitive ears from that most heinous of bad words...no, not that one... I'm talking about .... heh heh   FART.  That's right, you can't say 'fart' on television.  And so a once funny scene becomes ONE HUNDRED MILLION times more horrifying.

  Brodie (Jason Lee) has just been dumped by his girlfriend and speculates that it is because he farted while she was going down on him.  The censors had a problem with this, so they changed it to 'I vomited on her while we were fooling around'.  What?????  I know you have to edit that dialogue, but how is vomit less offensive?  Good lord!  That is a much more disturbing image to be left with and on top of that makes the rest of the dialogue make very little sense.  'I never vomited in front of her before.'  'What can I say?  I was relaxed at the time!'  I know I'm always puking on people when I get too comfortable with them.  LOL

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   So as a 'treat' for going 42 days accident free, our Assistant General Manager decided to get up at our general assembly and play the guitar for us.  I rolled my eyes and expected some country bumpkin crap, since most of this area doesn't know that we're above the Mason-Dixon line.  Much to my surprise, he was actually pretty good and played a couple of contemporary rock songs.  'Push' by Matchbox 20 and 'She Will Be Loved' by Maroon 5.  It was nice to see that I am not the only one squandering talent at Wal-mart. ;-)